the mummy: tomb of the dragon emperor - a movie review
category: action/adventure movie
name: the Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor
price: $10
seen at the AMC Independence Commons 20 in Independence, MO
rating: 5 of 10
The Mummy and the Mummy Returns were both very fun movies. They weren’t good, per se, but very enjoyable. Both were pretty solid in the ‘comedic quips by protagonist’ and both had a well executed comedic sidekick. They also had Rachel Weisz as Evelyn. I just looked up who replaced her and was shocked. The new Evelyn I saw Sunday night was Maria Bello, who was brilliant in Thank You for Smoking and was sexed on stairs in A History of Violence. She was very pretty in this mummy movie, but the character wasn’t very alluring. Her sexuality was downplayed. There was little tension between her and Rick (Fraser). I think the worst crime involving Evelyn is that it feels like they dropped the character’s IQ by 20-30 points. In the first two mummy flicks Evelyn was far more intelligent than Rick, in this one she was just as dumb.
Spoilers follow…
There was some intense cheese in this film. All of the romance was seriously hammed up. Rick tried to allure Evelyn as romantic music started to swell, she cast it off, the music was replaced by that sound effect of a needle being moved off of a record. Later Evelyn was trying to allure Rick, only to discover that he was sleeping. Again the music swelled, only to be replaced by the needle scratch. The two apparently had a kid, who was 19 for this movie. The parents (of course) haven’t aged. The 19 year old is nearly killed by a (she) ninja, only to clumsily fall for her in some very strained banter.
Michelle Yeoh’s Zi Juan character was the she-ninja’s mother. Her love, some general, was the father of she-ninja. Eventually the mourned general of Jet Li’s Emperor character was resurrected. He looked like crap and at no point interacted with his daughter-ninja or his beloved Zi Juan. Perhaps after 2000+ years all love dies. Between man and woman. Between father and daughter. He had never met his daughter, I suppose.
There were some fun action sequences. I liked the defense of the tower. I liked the yetis.
Entertainment value: 6 of 10
General quality level: 3 of 10
Theater experience: 8 of 10 (sparsely populated)
Company: 9 of 10 (Dawn stayed awake for the whole movie)
Courtesy Cup of Water: 7 of 10 (cold, potable, I had to fill it myself)
She-Ninja: 5 of 10 (Asia-philes will likely go nuts, she looks young, I couldn’t tell she was a she when she was demasked)